Dear Amy: Should I accompany my husband to his parents’ house in order to tell them that we are getting divorced, after 32 years of marriage?

He and I have been together since high school and have lived within five minutes of my in-laws for 30 years. We see them at least once a month.

After much careful consideration, we have decided that a divorce is the most responsible path for us, for reasons I won’t begin to explain.

My husband asked me to go with him to tell his parents, but I am conflicted.

I feel that closure is important and respectful, but we are not divorcing because everything is wonderful.

I feel like my husband knows it’ll be easier for him if I am with him, but I do not want to project like everything is OK.

What are your thoughts? What are some ways I can handle this news?

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I am also worried about the scene being too emotional for me, and I’d like to avoid that.

Splitting

Dear Splitting: Not every divorce is a “conscious uncoupling,” and it might be naive to believe that accompanying your husband would provide any “closure” to your in-laws. Closure is complicated, and you might not ever believe you’ve achieved it.

If you two are announcing your divorce, your in-laws will probably intuit that everything is not OK.

One reason to accompany your husband is to witness the narrative he presents to his parents (although this story could always change later), and to respectfully and discreetly let …read more

Source:: The Mercury News

      

Ask Amy: Should I consent to go with my husband to tell his parents we’re divorcing?

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